1. 1
    28
    Apr

    We have our own apartment now…in Springfield.

    Yup, it is official that Marc and I have an apartment. We moved in in the beginning of April. Since I still have school in Peoria, I stay at home during school days, and I stay in the apartment when i am not. Pretty awesome.

    I am still a student, and i am not currently employed right now. So, Marc pays all the bills, and he got us a new leather sofa set, a marble dinner set and an entertainment set. They are marvelous! His parents got us some appliances, new sheets, pots, etc. So far, we have everything we need and more. Every time Marc travels to Belize or Africa, he brings some things. Over the years, he collected alot of souvenirs and we used them to decorate the apartment. I am proud to say we got an awesome apartment..yey!

    Even though he pays all the bills, he calls it, “Our home”. I asked him about that, and he said, it is not just his, but ours. Ours. Ours. Ours. I’m so happy. I can’t wait to graduate, get a job and help with all of that stuff. 

    How did I get so lucky? I don’t know. All i know is, I prayed for someone like him over the years. And here he is. 

  2. 1
    27
    Apr

    vulnerable

    The first time in my life i feel so vulnerable- in a good way. To have someone know everything about you and still loves you even though some of them may be not very desirable by most people.  

    A few months ago, I was hospitalized because i overdosed on some pills. Even how much i want to regret it, i do not. I don’t know. It sounds so stupid, but for me, it isn’t. When Marc was informed of what has happened to me, he cried on the phone. His sister said he cried on his way to her house to cry some more and to have someone to talk to about what had happened. He cried. He said he cried because he could not imagine losing me. We were only dating for 4 months back then. And yet, he cried. 

    He loves me for me and only me. He loves me despite the scars and the melancholic thoughts in my head. He loves me despite of my bi-polar mood, and how i get upset of something so silly. He said he loves me because I make him very happy. I make him happy, and that makes me happy.

    He said he loves my giggle when i find something funny. He said he loves my sexy tummy and my smile. He loves my cooking, and how I have dinner ready just in time he gets home from work. He loves how silly I am and how i make him laugh. He said He loves cuddling with me while watching movies all day and being a bum.

    We have shown each other’s vulnerabilities. It is very scary and at the same time, it feels like home. He feels like home.

  3. 1
    6
    Apr

    My boyfriend and I fought twice today. And both times, i was on my way to my car about to leave our apartment and go home to my mommy. But twice he stopped me, hugged me and asked me nicely to come back inside the apartment. 

    He is not the most touchy feel-y romantic guy. He doesnt like giving flowers, not a “cuddle” kind of guy, and hates Valentine’s day. While i like all of this things. I know he expresses his love in other ways. He changed so much compared to how he was before. He now holds my hand more often, kisses me more often, cuddles me more often. But i guess i want more? He said he’s going to try to be more affectionate.

    He is sooo stubborn and doesn’t listen very well. But when he sees how much i want something, he does it with a blink of an eye. I told him to get an apartment for us, he got one a week later and moved in in less than 2 weeks. 

    I know he really loves me. He came after me twice when i was about to leave. Something that i only imagine happens in movies.

  4. 19
    Mar
  5. 15101
    14
    Mar

    (Source: jaymug, via paradoxofdreams)

  6. 647
    14
    Mar

    misery-fucking-loves-me:

    come watch this and cry with me.

    (Source: suzanneskrobecky)

  7. 3
    14
    Mar

    Alone. Again. Always being left alone and then when you all get bored or realize that I’m alive and here, you’ll come and find me or text me and if I answer coldly or don’t answer, I’d get spammed with what’s wrong or I’m here yeah if you need anything. No. Fuck you. Everytime I do need someone, no one is ever there. I pick myself up. I make myself feel better. Not you. Not her. Not some therapists. Me. I do it all. On my fucking own. So don’t asks me why I don’t want to tell you anything because I just don’t and even if I do, what fucking difference would it make. I’m fine on my own. I don’t care about the pain. I don’t are about your sweet words and empty promises. I don’t care about waking up alone and depressed. I don’t fucking care. I’m alone. I was alone then. I am alone now. I’ll always be alone. And I’m cool with it. In fact, I like it that way.

  8. 14817
    14
    Mar
  9. 188476
    14
    Mar

    love-me-forev3r:

    fucksociety95:

    this picture should have more then the amounts of notes it has, this shows us that not ever thing is “picture perfect” and that behind that smile and those eyes there is fear . So i beg you to please reblog this instead of a pair of shoes, someone smoking a blunt, and clothes … because this picture is literally worth 1,000 words 

    this picture says so much.

    (Source: awayfromearth, via lovemetoinfinity)

  10. 70
    14
    Mar
avatar_96
this is like my alter ego when i'm not studying nursing stuff
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